I feel like complete crap, im freaking out, and feel like hurting myself. Please read.?

Honestly if I were you i wouldn't trust her one bit. Thats my main thought after reading what you wrote. I don't know if she is true to you. I would be very suspicious. And I'm sure thats not what you wanted to hear, but from what I just read, she sounds like she would be unfaithful and rather umm well, slutty.